


Bittersweet

by nereidere



Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: 9S deals with grief ig, F/M, Masturbation, Necrophilia, Rape/Non-con Elements, Spoilers for The Tower, i GUESS. dead android, really just angst with a side of smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:34:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26954440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nereidere/pseuds/nereidere
Summary: Her lips were so soft, even sweeter than he’d imagined, and still warm.It helped him imagine she was still alive.
Relationships: 2B/9S (NieR: Automata)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 25





	Bittersweet

**Author's Note:**

> mind the warnings, please, if this sort of work makes you uncomfortable feel free to back out ! if not, please enjoy !

9S awoke to find himself lying on the ground, achy and disoriented, having fallen from the floor above him. There was rubble and dust around him, floating particles in the still air. He tried to move, but was immediately stabbed with a sharp pain in his left arm, wincing as he lifted it and noticed most of it had been blown off by the explosion. The stump was smoking, sparks flying from the broken wires. He gripped his arm, groaned in pain and rolled onto his side, squeezing his eyes shut and gritting his teeth. When he took a deep breath and lifted his gaze a moment later, his eyes met the lifeless body of 2B, one of those he had just fought. She looked peaceful, her eyes closed as if she was sleeping, but her lower body had been crushed by the collapsed structures.

9S gasped softly and scooted closer, reached towards the broken android and caressed her cheek slowly. How he wished she could feel it. His thumb grazed over soft artificial skin, eyes searching her face but met with emptiness. He touched the corner of her mouth, his thumb brushing over her bottom lip just slightly, as he let out a shaky breath and his heart ached. She was still so beautiful, he wanted to lean closer and kiss her, feel her lips against his as he had so yearned. But it was pointless, now, it was too late and she was gone. A spark of anger welled in his chest but was soon soothed as his fingers curled around her wrist and pulled her hand close, onto his cheek. He closed his eyes, focused on the familiar feeling of her glove as he placed his hand on hers and sobbed softly, trying to push away the painful feeling of longing, imagining her truly caressing him so. It was bittersweet, really, he felt conflicted as his emotions fought inside him. He was angry at her, for being cold, distant, when they could’ve had so much more. _Emotions are prohibited_ , she said, but he felt she didn’t truly believe it. She was so proper, so professional, maybe she kept telling that to herself simply to deny the existence of her feelings. But he knew, and he thought she did as well, that there was something more between them. If only she could’ve accepted and admitted it sooner.

_I **** you, 2B._

Hate.

Love.

Maybe both.

He sobbed again as he rolled onto his back, straining to sit up. He pulled 2B’s arm with him, and with a groan, he yanked, ripping it off her body. It was sickening, the noise as it separated from her, the blood that splattered on the white floor, the rest of her arm falling back onto the ground. He braced himself and stuck her arm onto the stump on his left, gasping with pain as more smoke rose from it, sparking as the broken wires connected to each other. He struggled to stand up, grunting, holding his — her — arm to keep it in place.

Pained, deep breaths. “I can’t stop”, he mumbled to himself through his teeth. “I have to keep fighting…”

He had to find A2. Strike down the machine lifeforms in his way. Kill them all. To end this, at last.

His vision flickered, distorted, and more pain shot up his left arm. He groaned, and heard his pod whir to life next to him.

_Alert. Virus detected._

Of course, 2B’s arm. Transplanting a body part from a corrupted unit was not without risk. But it could be removed easily enough, nothing more than another annoying bump in the road.

_Proposal: Hack into self and eliminate virus._

He sighed. “On it.”

A moment later, he finished, his pod confirming the removal of the virus as his vision clear once more. He took a deep breath, preparing himself to continue, but as he moved to take a step, pain shot through his body once more and his leg gave out. He collapsed to the floor with a cry, bracing his upper body with his arms, more sparks flying from the left one. He groaned and scooted upwards, closer to the wall, and leaned against it with a grunt. He let his head fall back and his eyes closed. The urge to press on was overtaken by exhaustion, and his eyes fell back to the lifeless body a little ways away. He could hardly fight in this condition, so perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to stay a while… And he wasn’t sure he was ready to leave her just yet.

He raised his — 2B’s — left arm to inspect it. It felt weird, seeing the hand that belonged to her moving by his will, but it felt… nice, too, he supposed. Kind of comforting, having a part of her to accompany him to the upcoming fight.

He closed his eyes, chuckled and pulled the arm close, against his chest, embracing it with his other arm.

“I’ll take care of it, for you”, he whispered and brought the hand up to his lips. The fabric of her glove felt nice, felt like _her_ , as he pressed soft kisses against her fingers. He felt sorrow well up inside him once more and he choked back a sob, pressing his lips harder into her hand.

“I’m sorry, 2B”, he mumbled and lifted his gaze towards her body once more, smiling softly. “I’m sure you would want to help me though, right? I appreciate it.”

He let his gaze fall down once more and pressed her hand against his cheek. How he wished she would’ve touched him like this while her arm was still her own, while she was still with him. He wanted her to touch him more, too, to feel her hands all over him. He would’ve let her, if only she’d admitted her feelings before it was too late. For so long he’d craved for her touch, and now he could no longer have it, not truly. But having the hand that belonged to her caress him so, he could almost imagine it really was her.

A shaky breath escaped his lips and he let her fingers trail down his cheek, onto his neck, wrapping around it and squeezing lightly. He’d felt her hands around his neck before… But it was different now.

He let her hand relax and trail down his neck, to his chest, tracing shapes against him as it moved.

“2B…” he whispered, quiet. He glanced over at her body, speaking to her now. “Would you have wanted to touch me like this…? You could have, you know… I would’ve liked it. I wanted to touch you too”

He thought back to their room at the resistance camp, their place to rest between missions. 2B had insisted on resting in separate beds, and he’d lie there, eyes on the ceiling, wishing so badly to be warming hers instead. He’d have been content to just lie with her, to feel her warmth, but he’d had other thoughts as well, of them touching each other, of kissing her, their bodies intertwining and connecting and— 

It was what humans did with people they loved, wasn’t it?

Instead he’d been left to imagine it, paint with his mind a picture of how she’d look beneath him and how it’d feel to touch her, gasping quietly into his sheets as he came to the thought of her.

But now, now he could feel her. As much as he wanted.

And so he sat up once more and crawled towards her, dragged himself next to her and settled there. He pushed her hair from her face gently and examined her, with affection, with sadness, adoration…a hint of resentment. It was all so unfair, that it had to go like this. Still, he was glad to be able to spend a quiet moment like this with her, even if it was under less than ideal circumstances. Oh, how beautiful she was… So peaceful. She could rest now, and he would push on, for her, for his revenge.

He leaned down close to her face, eyes on her soft lips. Those lips he’d craved to kiss for so long… His eyes fluttered closed and he sighed when his lips brushed ever so softly against hers. Would that he could feel her breath mingling with his, but for now, this was enough.

He kissed her then, desperate, bringing his hand to the back of her head to support her. He whispered her name between kisses, growing more feverish by the moment.

_2B, 2B, 2B…_

Her lips were so soft, even sweeter than he’d imagined, and still warm. It helped him imagine she was still alive.

He took her still intact hand in his and brought it to his chest, pressing it there. He let out a quiet sob, both happy and sad. She was finally touching him now, kissing him. It made his chest flutter and feel warm. Her hand slid down his chest, onto his thigh, and he gasped as he moved so it fell between his legs.

He mumbled against her lips. “Oh, 2B… Would you have wanted this? Would you have touched me here?”

He couldn’t keep his hips from bucking up into her hand, desperate for her touch. A broken moan came from his mouth as he pressed her hand against himself, grinding into it as he felt himself grow hotter in his pants.

He gasped and pulled back a little to look at her face. “I’ve wanted this so bad”, he groaned. “2B, 2B… Thank you.”

He took on a steady rhythm grinding into her hand, holding it close with her other hand, now attached to him. Soft moans fell from his lips as he worked himself up, face burning now and a need growing inside him.

“It feels so good, 2B”, he breathed. “Please, touch me more…”

With his free hand he pulled his shorts down just enough to free his cock that had begun to strain against the fabric, holding his breath as he wrapped 2B’s fingers around it. He exhaled shakily and reached down to stroke 2B’s cheek with his right hand, both of hers now wrapped around his cock. He started to move, slowly, the feeling of her gloves on his skin sent shivers of pleasure up his spine and pried soft sighs from his lips. He felt giddy, almost lightheaded, happy and in awe that he was finally doing this with her. His eyes closed and his head fell back as he settled into a rhythm once more, slow, almost excruciatingly so — he wanted this to last, to relish every moment and record them to memory, this was his first time with her after all and deserved to be treasured.

The slow pace soon became overwhelming, it was both too little and too much, and he craved more. And so the movements of his hips grew faster, his grip on 2B’s hand tightened around himself and the sensation drew a low, drawn-out moan from him. It was maddening, fucking into her hands like this, so good yet not enough, he wanted to make her feel good too, sink into her and hold her close until they both saw stars, but she…

She was gone. A2 had killed her. And then 9S had killed her, and the other 2B models, and now she lie here with her lower body mangled, crushed beneath the collapsed ceiling.

He felt a sting in his chest but pushed the thought from his mind, focusing once more on the tightness around his cock, the delicious friction of her hands, how amazing it made him feel to have her touch him so.

He turned his hazy eyes to her face once more, reaching to stroke her hair with his free hand. Soft, white locks fell over porcelain skin, red lips, long lashes, her peaceful face… He felt such warmth swell in his chest that moment, and he felt he had to tell her how he felt.

And so came whispered words, littered with gasps and moans, spilling from his lips. “2B, you’re so - so beautiful, 2B, ah — I love you.” He felt tears well behind his eyes, and he wasn’t sure if they were happy or sad.

“I love you so much.”

He let out a cry, a drop of his tears falling onto her cheek. He squeezed his eyes shut and her fingers tighter around his cock, losing himself into the feeling of fucking against her, the movements of his hips growing erratic as his body was racked with sobs. It felt so good, so blissful, his stomach tightened as his release grew near, the air filled with his moans and the sound of her gloves rubbing against his skin.

His body twitched as he came, with a cry, harder than ever before, his release coating the marble floor next to his lover. The pleasure was mind numbing, his entire body tensed and trembled as he rode out his bliss into her hands, whispering her name under his ragged breath in between moans.

Finally, after the wave of pleasure that washed over him simmered down, he was overtaken with exhaustion once more and collapsed forward, panting. He let her arm fall back onto the ground at her side, and so it did with a thud. He took a deep breath and sobbed, then, into his hands, both from grief over his loss and the realization of what he’d done. How could something he’d wanted for so long, that felt so good, make him feel so disgusting and vile now? He let his tears fall until they ran out, his body trembling with suppressed cries. He wasn’t sure how long he cried, nor did he think it mattered; it felt as if time was still in this moment. There was only him, and 2B. A void, before the final push, before it would all be over.

He dragged his weary body closer to hers, supporting himself with his elbows while carefully settling to lie down and lean against her. He let out a deep sigh, letting his body relax, eyes glazing over her face.

“I’m sorry, 2B”, he whispered. After a short pause, his lips curled into a small smile.

“Thank you.”

He closed his eyes, taking one final moment to be still, to rest, against her familiar softness, before he had to get up and run into another fight. It felt dull, lonely, fighting without her. But he was almost at the end, and he had to push forward.

To end this.

For her.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading....
> 
> (do not perceive me)


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